Thursday, October 19, 2017

18 Lists to Make When Life is Overwhelming

I'm a big list maker.
In fact, I have a notebook just for lists.
not at all weird

anyways, here's some ideas for lists to make.
cause I know life gets overwhelming.
and sometimes all you can control is a list.
  1. your pet peeves 
  2. things making you stressed 
  3. reasons you love your family
  4. people who love you
  5. people you love
  6. favorite baby names
  7. weekend adventures to take
  8. funny moments 
  9. skills you would like to learn
  10. favorite places in your town/city
  11. compliments you've received
  12.  people who inspire you 
  13. a extreme to-do list 
  14. small things that make you happy
  15. things you would have in your dream house
  16. meaningful songs to you 
  17. a list of your favorite holidays (in order)
  18. a mean plan for the week

are you a list maker?
what kinds of lists to make when you're overwhelmed? 

Saturday, October 14, 2017

i know but i don't

I breathe in.
open my eyes.
and i don't understand. 

there are so many things I don't understand. 
so many questions I have. 
a future that is so uncertain. 

why is life so hard for some,
yet so seemingly easy for others.

why are the highs so high,
but the lows can be so darn low?

why is the future so fogy.

why is the missing so hard.

//  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //  //

I know the right 'answers'.
I know the right theology.
but it's still confusing.
and I will always have questions.

I realize-
I don't know it all.
because God is a God of mystery.
He is a big God.
and He would be a lot less powerful if I did know why. 

Sunday, October 8, 2017

32 thoughts

  1. I love sweatpants
  2. why cant we wear sweatpants with nice shirts everyday
  3. fashion 
  4. so stupid
  5. and now I'm breaking out
  6. wow
  7. there is actually a mountain on my forehead
  8. more like a range
  9. oh look, there's two on my cheek too
  10. wow
  11. am I stressed or pms-ing? 
  12. both
  13. definitely both
  14. did I mention I love sweatpants?
  15. mmmm coffee
  16. gotta love coffee
  17. I wonder about the tea drinkers of the world 
  18. interesting people
  19. I wonder what that's like
  20. well at least Im not addicted 
  21. I don't even drink it every day
  22. good job me
  23. wait, I have school to do
  24. school
  25. math
  26. MATH
  27. whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
  28. I'm so confused 
  30. ohmygoodness I need to find a collage 
  31. why is looking for a collage so hard
  32. ahhh, love my sweatpants though

Saturday, September 23, 2017

thank you

Last week blew me out of the water.

Julia, Elizabeth, Vanessa and Grace Anne wrote some amazing words.

KaraJoannyMikayla, and Jessica joined in on Suicide Prevention Week, publishing thoughts on their blogs.

And it was wonderful.

It was wonderful seeing something so taboo and tricky, yet so relevant and personal, sprinkled across the blogisphere.

So I just want to take a moment to say thank you-
thank you for standing up.
thank you for getting involved.
thank you for being supportive.
thank you for the posts, comments, and prayers.

Thank you. 

Friday, September 15, 2017

morning is coming [STAY. ft. me]


but why?
why stick around when every second crawls over you with shame and exhaust?
why continue to walk through each day like this? 
why live when dying would be so much easier? 

because oh friend, you are in the night. 
you are fighting and I know it's beyond hard. 
I know it feels like you are too far gone. 
I know you think we would be better off without you. 

because let me tell you a secret: 
this is not the end of your story. 

the people you've convinced yourself are tired of dealing with you,
want more years to love you

the shame that is so heavy to carry, 
doesn't have to be carried alone

the exhaustion of life will heal with change and rest,
and doesn't warrant a very permanent sleep.

the terrifying idea that you are too far gone,
is nothing but a lie.   

the thought that life will never get better,
couldn't be more untrue. 

you, dear friend, are in the night. 
and the night is hard, long, scary, and exhausting. 
the night brings emotion that you are scared to face.
but please, don't hide it forever. 
because holding those emotions in, all alone, is what keeps us in the night. 

and I know it's impossible to see, 
but morning is coming. 
it's way closer than you think.
it's not always going to be fun, but it will get better

you will laugh again. 
you will feel the sun.
you will be free from what's holding you down. 
you will be stronger than the night,
and live to see morning. 

so please, stay. 
morning is coming.

if you are struggling, please reach out to talk with someone. 1-800-273-8255 is a awesome, safe, confidential resource. please please please reach out. 

Thursday, September 14, 2017

because your light matters [STAY. ft. elizabeth]

when sweet sweet elissa asked me to write a post on the word "stay" in honor of World Suicide Prevention Week and her dear friend Maddy who passed away on Oct. 4th, it got me thinking of a lot of moments in my life where "stay" was difficult. I remember having to move and loving where we lived, i wanted to stay. i remember my dad holding on to the last of his days, being told i had to let him go, when all i wanted was for him to stay with me. I remember the anxiety and sadness i felt, and not wanting to stay anymore. but most of all, i remember the whisper i heard, telling me to "stay," because i was never alone.

so what does stay mean to you? for me, i see it different ways

i. staying present. it's hard these days to sometimes just keep yourself planted in the now, instead of alway being worried about the future. but staying present, taking note of where you are and respecting that, that's what staying should look like.

ii. staying faithful. this is a hard one sometimes, because it's easy to want to do your own thing and to think you can figure it all out on your own, but stay faithful to the Lord. seek his presence, give him your time, and live your life in step with Christ. stay faithful, fighting the good fight.

iii. staying hopeful. it hurts when people tell you to just be positive, because i get it, that's not always possible, but don't lose hope. one of the many many wonderful things that our Lord gives us, is never-ending, unrelenting, overflowing grace and hope. because of him, we can have hope for the future and say "it is well with my soul."

so honey, i know life is hard, i know there are struggles that no one knows about, that you're ashamed of, that you keep hidden in the darkest corner of your closet. i know, because i've been there, i've hid in that closet, fists held tight, eyes blurred, and silent sobs so no one would hear. it's so lonely, and scary, and small, but you know what dear friends? that small closet is never too small for God. stay, and find refuge in him. stay, because your light matters.

stay-what does that word make you think?

love you all my sweet friends,


so Elizabeth is kinda one of my favorite people in the world- beyond the blogosphere, I actually get to see her in real life, which is just as awesome as you would imagine. Elizabeth blogs over at elizabeth anne, and she also writes poetry at chasing moonlight. Thanks for reading, and don't forget to say "hey!' in the comments below!

Wednesday, September 13, 2017

kinder by caring [STAY. ft. vanessa]

After I had met some people who struggled with mental illnesses I found myself wanting to be there for more people. I never understood how much of an impact mental illnesses have on someone's lives until I met people who struggle with anxiety, depression, eating disorders and other mental illnesses. These people opened my eyes to what having a mental illness is like and I am so blessed to have had that opportunity.

Mental illnesses make it impossible for people to stay present in their lives. They make everyday tasks into huge challenges so when someone has to deal with a lot of little tasks everyday one can become very overwhelmed. Staying present in their lives becomes a very hard thing for people to do when they are preoccupied with little tasks that become so much bigger.

Imagine living your life with worries and fears. Fixating over what people are thinking and being taken down by the thoughts in your head. That's a hard way to live. Living in the moment completely vanishes because you are living in the past or the present. It's a hard life to live.

It's important to show compassion to every human being because you never know what they are going through. It's hard for someone to openly admit they are struggling so by being there for someone you can provide them with a little bit of support to make their day easier. Different people will need different kinds of support so just because one thing doesn't work does not mean you should give up and move on. It's about treating everyone like friends so they feel comfortable and welcomed in this world.

Care for others by:
-Telling people if they need anything you will try your best
-Being friendly
-Offering a listening ear
-Sending little notes of encouragement
-Small acts of kindness
-Giving out hugs
-Respecting boundaries
-Telling people how much they mean to you

Suicide is one of the big topics when it comes to mental health but there is still a huge part of society that has a hard time talking about it. All mental illnesses can lead to suicide and that is a crazy thing. Simply said, show your support to every human being and you'll be able to help prevent people from taking their lives. It's all about being kind to one another.

Don't forget about yourself. Sometimes we put so much focus on other people and things we forget to check in with how we are doing mentally. It's important to take care of your mental health too! Don't neglect yourself. Every once in a while do a check in to see how you are doing.

Self-care check-in questions:
-How have I been feeling the past few days on a scale from 1-10?
-Have there been things on my mind that are drowning my thoughts?
-How have I been sleeping recently?
-Am I taking care of my personal needs?
-Do I spend time with positive people?

We all matter so much in this world so stay with us and make the world a kinder place. Care for one another and yourself so that we can strive as a community of human beings.

thanks for coming back for day 3 of Suicide Prevention Week! my dear friend Vanessa (who blogs at Simply Me) so willingly jumped on board to this project, and I'm so thankful for her wise words!  Go check out her blog and show her some love in the comments! 
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