Showing posts with label voices. Show all posts
Showing posts with label voices. Show all posts

Monday, June 27, 2016

dressing room deductions


I stand in the small dressing room, my eyes surveying the clingy cotton
subconsciously analyzing every millimeter of my torso.

Third dressing room of the day, and the walls begin to choke me.
I'd been happy with nothing.

It all looked bad.
on me.
But not on the hanger.

It took a full 5.789 seconds to deduct 437 negative things about
the shirt
my 'bingo wings'
abs
hair
my life.

So I hung those two cotton shirts up on their plastic hangers
with full knowledge that feelings lie.
thoughts lie.
the mirror lies.

And I grabbed my purse and got out of there.

Today wasn't a great day to be adventurous.
And I'm okay with that.

I'm okay as long as I know that
feelings can be liars.
thoughts can be liars.
And the mirror can be a liar.


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Monday, October 12, 2015

voices


We are told how to fix our problem areas.
How to slim our thighs, chisel our abdomens into Pinterest worthy stomachs, tone our arms.
I am told this dress looks flattering on me- very slimming.
Yet I am told to love the person in I see in the mirror; to embrace my weight, my size, my thighs and all.
 
We are pushed to resolve ourselves to losing weight over the new year. 
We are told to be happy with ourselves.
We are told to strive for perfection.
 
I am told order the salad; but in order to impress him, order the burger.
We are told to cut out soy, gluten, dairy, meat, GMO’s, sugar, animal products, carbohydrates, legumes, fat, all things processed, anything inorganic, high cholesterol, high sodium.
And by high cholesterol and high sodium, I mean all sodium and cholesterol.
We are told to enjoy food.
 
We are told we are too small, too big, too short, too tall. We are too skinny, too fat, too underdressed, too overdressed.
I am told my heart is what matters.
 
I hear a lot of voices telling me a lot of things. But I have other scenes than my ears.
I have eyes that see beautiful women all around me, inspiring, guiding, helping others.
I smell change in our old stereotyped ideas, but I also see how these ideas have been embedded into us. 
I touch uncertainty as I watch others move with confidence.

I feel my heart.
Beating, searching, questioning, and absorbing all these things. 
My legs are not a problem.
My heath is not determined by the latest dieting fad.
And my value as a human being isn’t tangled up in the food on my plate, the image in the mirror, or the cruel opinions of others.
No no. My value comes from something much greater than all that.
And those voices that surround me? They can have their opinion. And I’ll have mine.
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