Showing posts with label rest. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rest. Show all posts

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

free at last

well, I turned in my last paper of junior year.
I watched some of my best friends throw their caps into the air.
we took our bow together.
the announcements are on the fridge. 

and we're free for summer. 
we're ready for beaches
long walks
sleeping in 

I'm ready to rest. 
my room needs a deep cleaning. 
the world weighs heavily on me.
I need some sun.

although I'm free,
I need Jesus. 
his stability calls to me, 
begging me to submit myself to his timing. 
his schedule. 
his freedom. 
oh how I find rest in his freedom. 

Thursday, April 28, 2016

Retreat in the Midst of Chaos

I sit listening to the gentle waves. 

Sunlight beating into my heart. 
I think about the light of Jesus I prayed about this morning.

Typical 'retreat sentiments'
             {excerpt from my journal, February 12, 2016} 

I skimmed over these words as I flipped to a blank page last night.
Remembering those quiet moments, while I was free to be still.

I think about the ocean I drive by everyday.
The tides going in and out, compatible with the moon.
How complex those simple moments are.

I have four weeks left of school. A research paper to write. Math to complete. Two science exams, along with my history papers.
My sister is graduating.
She has to decide where she will spend the next four years of her life tonight.

I am Dorthy in our dance school's production of The Wizard of Oz. 
We are going host family and throw a graduation party.
I am going to drink coffee and write papers late into the night.
Enough sweat to fill a lake is about to seep from my pours.

Rest? Calm?

During finals?
While my one of best friend packs to leave?
When I wait in the wings, preparing to dance a full length ballet?

I asked God about peace last night.
I poured out my thoughts, my questions, my heartache.
And although my eyelids were drooping and my mattress encompassed my exhausted body, I read my words from that day.

My 'retreat alone time' journal entry.
My thoughts during that weekend.
And although it was a bubble, it wasn't the only time I experience this peace.

I experienced it this morning as I globed on mascara.
I experienced it as I drove to class.
I was at peace during my test.
My soul is at peace, because of Him.

Today, I pray you will find calm in the storm.
I hope you will find joy in the ordinary.
I pray you will anchor yourself on the peace of Jesus.

And may you know how loved and valuable you are in the chaos of this crazy life.

Sunday, January 24, 2016


I feel like a just ran a marathon but only remember bits and pieces.  It's a blur of ups and downs, with life throwing me round and round.
I feel like it was nothing profound.
Just research and dancing and hoping and praying and very little clowning around.

I've eaten more ice cream then I want to admit;
I've thrown fits
And I'm sure I've shrank an inch.

Now I'm more tired then I know
I'm waiting for my faith to grow.
I trying to focus on the pros
And remind my self that it's okay to stop and smell the rose.

So now I sit staring at the screen
Wondering what it all even means,
While shoving down greens.

I'm listening for His voice
And realizing I have a choice.
A choice to listen to His words

Saying, "Have faith Elissa, and rest in me. I know exactly what your going to be. You worry and stress and panic and cry; while you know I'm here, walking by your side.
You need to rest in my unending grace.
And know that I see your sweet tired face."

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